This past week has proven to me that mom-nesia does not decrease with time. The opposite is true. TWICE in one day I was walking out the door, looking at a cup or whatever that I wanted to make sure I brought with me and I ended up forgetting it anyway. It's funny because I become so proud of myself that I am NOT going to forget this item because I am looking at it and there is not much more time between now and me leaving that I "couldn't" forget it. Argh. I can't even blame it on the baby because these were times when I was just going to work and didn't have the baby plus baby stuff to worry about.
Another milestone occurred this week. I got sick. I haven't gotten sick in I don't know how long. I even survived a bad cold that was going around the office. All of a sudden I felt like I had been hit by a bus (aka flu symptoms). Luckily, I quickly scanned the "What to expect the first year" to find that I can still breastfeed. Although, otherwise touching the baby is not exactly recommended, so now what? I will just lean over her with my boob? No, in all reality, I just washed my hands a LOT and wore a medical mask. This seemed to not affect Olivia, although I don't quite know how I didn't scare her...leaning over her with this thing covering most of my face. Perhaps it's all in the eyes at this point anyway.
Whatever I did, she does not seem to have my symptoms..thank GOD. I am sure it's because she got the immunities through my breastmilk blah blah blah. I wanted to cry like a baby with how crappy I felt, let alone a baby crying like a baby...
Olivia did, however, manage to get some sort of cold where she is now a booger factory. When you are at your first pediatrician's visit. They show you how to use a bulb syringe to suck the snot out of their little noses. "Just put it at the tip of her nose, like this" my pediatrician says. Oh, and it looks so easy WHEN THERE'S NOTHING TO CLEAN. As Darwin would have it, when you actually go to mimic this "simple" procedure at home, the boogers don't get sucked out and the baby does not hold her head still.
Convinced I was doing something wrong, I, of course, Googled how to clean a baby's nose. Oh, and the videos I saw. It's all a little traumatic. Some instances look like child abuse while other parents seem to have a hospital in their bathroom. What is a mother to do?!
I ended up ignoring the pediatrician and stuck the end of the syringe a little deeper into Olivia's nose. Well, it didn't work to my satisfaction, but there was minor improvement. I guess I will have to take what I can get and learn to live with Olivia having a bat in the cave once in a while.
On the happy side of baby life, she is learning to talk up a storm. No actual words, of course, but the gibberish a baby makes she makes loud and proud. Mama's proud too. Once we pass gibberish, she will be going straight to English, Spanish, Italian and French. ;-) And maybe a little Latin, Carpe diem O!
Friday, June 26, 2009
Friday, June 19, 2009
You win some...
Last Sunday night, O pulled one of those waking up at 2, 5, and 7am. Lately, fortunately, she only takes one boob and promptly falls back asleep, so the obscenely crazy hours she wakes up are more manageable. BUT, last Monday I was telling John, before we went to bed, that I miss that one time she slept until 5am and, honestly, I think she heard me because she slept from 8:30pm to 5am! I was so excited! Cautiously so, though, and it proved to be a wise decision because the rest of the week she's been back to the 2-5-7 thing. Boooooo.
I did read, from the supernanny book, that she probably won't sleep through the night until she's on solids. It makes sense, but then you hear about those moms whose babies slept through the night at two months. OBVIOUSLY two month olds are not on solids. So, you win some you lose some. I really really can't complain about the sleep thing, though cuz, other than that, O is a dream come true. She's such a happy baby and so easy to read. If she's crying, she's either tired or hungry. If she just ate, you put her to bed and visa versa. Otherwise, she's happy as a clam.
I am still bringing her to bed with me after her middle of the night feedings. I figure that once she does start sleeping through the night, she'll be in her crib. Neither of us will be awake to care. I just can't bring myself to put O back in bed when the ability to snuggle with her is right there. I want it even more now that I am back at work. I love waking up with her. I definitely need therapy. John said that I will regret this when she can't sleep in her own bed when she's five. That may be true, but she IS going to sleep in her crib. My hope is that she is just a very adaptive baby. I am pretty sure I am pressing my luck. But, I also come back to John with "So you will get up and put her back to sleep if she cries." He doesn't have a response for that... Point team mom.
Out of curiosity, I wanted to know how long it takes for alcohol to show up in the boob juice, so I googled the question. To my surprise I found several articles stating that "pumping and dumping" is a waste because alcohol is not stored in the breast milk, like it is not stored in our blood. Once it is out of your blood, it is out of your leche. That means, if you just wait it out, and probably suffer through the rock hard full supply stage, you will eventually have untainted stuff after an adult beverage or two. The fact is, alcohol shows up in the milk 30-60 mins after consumption and you should wait two hours per drink to have it safely out of your system. Now I am flashing back to pouring that sacred stuff down the drain and shedding a tear.
Speaking of shedding, that hair that doesn't fall out when I was pregnant is now starting to fall out again. Not in chunks, like I have heard, but it's back to it's pre-pregnancy state. I have found strands of hair in everything now...bottles, clothes, baby... Now I know how our cat feels.
I did read, from the supernanny book, that she probably won't sleep through the night until she's on solids. It makes sense, but then you hear about those moms whose babies slept through the night at two months. OBVIOUSLY two month olds are not on solids. So, you win some you lose some. I really really can't complain about the sleep thing, though cuz, other than that, O is a dream come true. She's such a happy baby and so easy to read. If she's crying, she's either tired or hungry. If she just ate, you put her to bed and visa versa. Otherwise, she's happy as a clam.
I am still bringing her to bed with me after her middle of the night feedings. I figure that once she does start sleeping through the night, she'll be in her crib. Neither of us will be awake to care. I just can't bring myself to put O back in bed when the ability to snuggle with her is right there. I want it even more now that I am back at work. I love waking up with her. I definitely need therapy. John said that I will regret this when she can't sleep in her own bed when she's five. That may be true, but she IS going to sleep in her crib. My hope is that she is just a very adaptive baby. I am pretty sure I am pressing my luck. But, I also come back to John with "So you will get up and put her back to sleep if she cries." He doesn't have a response for that... Point team mom.
Out of curiosity, I wanted to know how long it takes for alcohol to show up in the boob juice, so I googled the question. To my surprise I found several articles stating that "pumping and dumping" is a waste because alcohol is not stored in the breast milk, like it is not stored in our blood. Once it is out of your blood, it is out of your leche. That means, if you just wait it out, and probably suffer through the rock hard full supply stage, you will eventually have untainted stuff after an adult beverage or two. The fact is, alcohol shows up in the milk 30-60 mins after consumption and you should wait two hours per drink to have it safely out of your system. Now I am flashing back to pouring that sacred stuff down the drain and shedding a tear.
Speaking of shedding, that hair that doesn't fall out when I was pregnant is now starting to fall out again. Not in chunks, like I have heard, but it's back to it's pre-pregnancy state. I have found strands of hair in everything now...bottles, clothes, baby... Now I know how our cat feels.
Monday, June 15, 2009
My knight in shining armor!
You know how husband earn “husband points”…like when they do the dishes without being asked, give you massages (or, in my case, play with my hair), clean up after themselves, fix things, etc. By doing said acts, you love them just a little bit more. Well, John earned about a thousand husband points yesterday. We were walking home from my parents (O was in the stroller), when a group of teenagers sped past us. No matter where you are, this is an unsafe thing to do, but this is a pretty heavily populated (with kids) neighborhood. We ranted for a few minutes on how terrible and stupid those teenagers are. Then, it just so happened that they were headed to this house (apparently a graduation party was in progress) and we walked past them as the two girls and two boys were getting out of the car. The driver had not quite made it out of the car, and, before I knew it, John was in his face serving him up a big can of whoop ass while his friend were looking on. I never knew John had it in him, but apparently, he has that white suit of armor when it comes to the safety of his child. Ohhh, my heart has wings. Olivia, you should be so proud of your daddy! (AND you should never be like those stupid teenagers…but we’ll have that talk later, like when you can understand what I am saying).
On another note, this past Friday started off pretty well. I was in super-mommy mode and I took Olivia to the children’s museum (even though there is not a ton for her, I thought I would just do what I could to make her a baby genius). After the museum, I decided to go grocery shopping. Well, on my way to the store, I was almost there…I got rear-ended. Thank GOD it was from a stop and no one, especially Olivia, was hurt. My day went pretty much downhill from there. I got the offender’s information and then went to the police station…apparently the wrong police station. Then, I went to the police station they told me was the correct police station and THAT police station questioned whether or not it was under their jurisdiction. By this time, I was in the red zone of Olivia’s feeding time. I knew that if they sent me elsewhere, I would have to just go home or face the wrath of a hungry O. “Luckily” they were able to take the report, but while filling out the paperwork, Olivia started to cry. She cried all the way home until I was able to feed her. By then, I was totally stressed and NOT going out of the house again. Aside from the feeding fiasco, Olivia was blissfully unaware of the downward spiral that was Friday. It certainly puts “normal, uneventful” days in perspective. I may think twice when I put on my super-mommy cape again. It seems like you can use up your mommy points for the day if you push it.
On another note, this past Friday started off pretty well. I was in super-mommy mode and I took Olivia to the children’s museum (even though there is not a ton for her, I thought I would just do what I could to make her a baby genius). After the museum, I decided to go grocery shopping. Well, on my way to the store, I was almost there…I got rear-ended. Thank GOD it was from a stop and no one, especially Olivia, was hurt. My day went pretty much downhill from there. I got the offender’s information and then went to the police station…apparently the wrong police station. Then, I went to the police station they told me was the correct police station and THAT police station questioned whether or not it was under their jurisdiction. By this time, I was in the red zone of Olivia’s feeding time. I knew that if they sent me elsewhere, I would have to just go home or face the wrath of a hungry O. “Luckily” they were able to take the report, but while filling out the paperwork, Olivia started to cry. She cried all the way home until I was able to feed her. By then, I was totally stressed and NOT going out of the house again. Aside from the feeding fiasco, Olivia was blissfully unaware of the downward spiral that was Friday. It certainly puts “normal, uneventful” days in perspective. I may think twice when I put on my super-mommy cape again. It seems like you can use up your mommy points for the day if you push it.
Friday, June 12, 2009
Are we THERE yet?!
If I start counting my weeks post-maternity leave, this is going to be like another pregnancy with no due date. :-0 I have to stop.
Today, is Friday. I usually look forward to Fridays, but now it has been elevated in status due to the fact I don't have to work and I get to spend the day with O.
I guess the bonus of working is that I definitely appreciate the time I DO spend with her. You hear that a lot from working moms: you are a better parent because you aren't 24-7 baby and you appreciate the precious time you have with your angel. I would say that is too true. (the appreciating part..the better parent part will have to be determined when O learns to talk and makes me feel guilty about leaving her).
I was just e-mailing a former coworker about my feelings about returning to work. I have to say, I find that I had just hit my stride as a mom and then I have to leave it all. It's not been as unbearable as I thought it would be, but I am not one of those woman who can't be without her profession...I really liked being a mom. O makes it seem easy and her smiles are always the best reward. I'll have to train my coworkers to smile like a three-month-old....
We feel empowered as women when we achieve certain statuses (stati?) in male dominated profession. Like, when I became a licenced architect, I felt pretty good...that some of that education had paid off. But, post-baby, I envy women who work in more female-oriented professions...whatever they may be... Don't get me wrong, having Karen (yes, shout out to you, Karen) in the office has been a huge blessing to have such a great supportive experienced mom to be there for me at work...but there are times, like last Tuesday, when it was just me and the boys and I needed a pump break. When you are out in the field, there really isn't as subtle way to sneak off and pump and I am not aware of another excuse to come up with that would allow me to disappear for 20 minutes. So, I had to actually say to my boss "I have to go pump." I might as well have said, I have my period...it gets the same awkward response when you bring to a man's attention that you have woman issues. Not like making breastmilk is an "issue" to me, but I am pretty sure my boss is not used to having an employee who needs to take pump breaks.
It was pretty rough, though, on Tuesday because I couldn't find an opportune time to take such an extended break, so I waited until after lunch. That is a pretty long time to go sans release. By the time I attached those cone shaped suckers to me, I was in some pain and the girls were pretty rock solid. Not exactly a pleasant experience. I need to learn to be a little stronger about just doing what needs to be done when it needs to be done. I don't want them exploding or anything. My dread is, in the future, my boss has Tuesdays booked with meetings. Great for him, getting CA meetings out of the way all in one day...I am already panicking about when I am going to be able to pump. Not a woman in sight for any of these meetings to lend a sympathetic glance. :-(
Today is sunny (finally). I am debating on returning to the Children's Museum with O. Not much there for three-month olds, but there is stuff. I just don't want to show up and find the place swarming with kids running everywhere. I don't hate kids, of course I love my own, but I hate kids en-masse and mommies who have tunnel vision for their own tots and don't have consideration for others. I shouldn't judge, though, I am sure I will be "that mom" one day....and proud of it! Maybe just a walk to the library will do. You have to be quiet there.
Olivia is starting to turn over in her crib. The other night I found her 90 degrees from where she started. I am not sure whether to be excited about the accomplishment, or scared that she is starting to become more mobile. I'll take the former...
This week at daycare, she got just great reviews! Also, grandma daycare brought O to my work yesterday. I got to have lunch with two of my favorite people in the world. It was a great way to end the work week. Plus, I forgot how wonderful that Indian buffet was at the place by my work. YUM!
06.08.09
JOHN: Looks like 3 naps ( 2 short, 1 long) this morning. Caregiver was just finishing with the 2nd bottle when I went down. Olivia smiled when she recognized me. Played with her for a bit. She was pretty chatty and grabbing the chain link toys. So, business as usual. I'm sure we'll start hearing actual words soon.
TEACHER COMMENTS: Great day! She's been giving me a lot of smiles today. Cooing and making lots of happy sounds. Took lots of naps. Went to nap on her own. She had fun on the floor while touching the hanging toy by the mirror. Happy mood :)
06.10.09
JOHN: I got there as the 2nd bottle went down… Olivia smiled when she saw me… then a couple of big burps on my lap and a little came back up. Saved by the bib. Other than that it was the same as usual - smiley, happy and chatty. Caregiver is thinking she may have to tap my secret stash of formula. We shall see.
TEACHER COMMENTS: Great day! Happy mood :) She's been happy and continued on the floor mat while looking and touching the hanging toys. She loved looking at the musical mobile in her crib. Cooing and smiling a lot.
Today, is Friday. I usually look forward to Fridays, but now it has been elevated in status due to the fact I don't have to work and I get to spend the day with O.
I guess the bonus of working is that I definitely appreciate the time I DO spend with her. You hear that a lot from working moms: you are a better parent because you aren't 24-7 baby and you appreciate the precious time you have with your angel. I would say that is too true. (the appreciating part..the better parent part will have to be determined when O learns to talk and makes me feel guilty about leaving her).
I was just e-mailing a former coworker about my feelings about returning to work. I have to say, I find that I had just hit my stride as a mom and then I have to leave it all. It's not been as unbearable as I thought it would be, but I am not one of those woman who can't be without her profession...I really liked being a mom. O makes it seem easy and her smiles are always the best reward. I'll have to train my coworkers to smile like a three-month-old....
We feel empowered as women when we achieve certain statuses (stati?) in male dominated profession. Like, when I became a licenced architect, I felt pretty good...that some of that education had paid off. But, post-baby, I envy women who work in more female-oriented professions...whatever they may be... Don't get me wrong, having Karen (yes, shout out to you, Karen) in the office has been a huge blessing to have such a great supportive experienced mom to be there for me at work...but there are times, like last Tuesday, when it was just me and the boys and I needed a pump break. When you are out in the field, there really isn't as subtle way to sneak off and pump and I am not aware of another excuse to come up with that would allow me to disappear for 20 minutes. So, I had to actually say to my boss "I have to go pump." I might as well have said, I have my period...it gets the same awkward response when you bring to a man's attention that you have woman issues. Not like making breastmilk is an "issue" to me, but I am pretty sure my boss is not used to having an employee who needs to take pump breaks.
It was pretty rough, though, on Tuesday because I couldn't find an opportune time to take such an extended break, so I waited until after lunch. That is a pretty long time to go sans release. By the time I attached those cone shaped suckers to me, I was in some pain and the girls were pretty rock solid. Not exactly a pleasant experience. I need to learn to be a little stronger about just doing what needs to be done when it needs to be done. I don't want them exploding or anything. My dread is, in the future, my boss has Tuesdays booked with meetings. Great for him, getting CA meetings out of the way all in one day...I am already panicking about when I am going to be able to pump. Not a woman in sight for any of these meetings to lend a sympathetic glance. :-(
Today is sunny (finally). I am debating on returning to the Children's Museum with O. Not much there for three-month olds, but there is stuff. I just don't want to show up and find the place swarming with kids running everywhere. I don't hate kids, of course I love my own, but I hate kids en-masse and mommies who have tunnel vision for their own tots and don't have consideration for others. I shouldn't judge, though, I am sure I will be "that mom" one day....and proud of it! Maybe just a walk to the library will do. You have to be quiet there.
Olivia is starting to turn over in her crib. The other night I found her 90 degrees from where she started. I am not sure whether to be excited about the accomplishment, or scared that she is starting to become more mobile. I'll take the former...
This week at daycare, she got just great reviews! Also, grandma daycare brought O to my work yesterday. I got to have lunch with two of my favorite people in the world. It was a great way to end the work week. Plus, I forgot how wonderful that Indian buffet was at the place by my work. YUM!
06.08.09
JOHN: Looks like 3 naps ( 2 short, 1 long) this morning. Caregiver was just finishing with the 2nd bottle when I went down. Olivia smiled when she recognized me. Played with her for a bit. She was pretty chatty and grabbing the chain link toys. So, business as usual. I'm sure we'll start hearing actual words soon.
TEACHER COMMENTS: Great day! She's been giving me a lot of smiles today. Cooing and making lots of happy sounds. Took lots of naps. Went to nap on her own. She had fun on the floor while touching the hanging toy by the mirror. Happy mood :)
06.10.09
JOHN: I got there as the 2nd bottle went down… Olivia smiled when she saw me… then a couple of big burps on my lap and a little came back up. Saved by the bib. Other than that it was the same as usual - smiley, happy and chatty. Caregiver is thinking she may have to tap my secret stash of formula. We shall see.
TEACHER COMMENTS: Great day! Happy mood :) She's been happy and continued on the floor mat while looking and touching the hanging toys. She loved looking at the musical mobile in her crib. Cooing and smiling a lot.
Sunday, June 7, 2009
How do I love thee!
Last night I put Olivia down to sleep and she was pretty much wide awake...kicking, smiling, looking around for things to do. Then, I went to the bathroom to brush my teeth and came back to check on her, expecting to have to soothe her to sleep or something and she was out, like a light. There are many things we do as parents that concern us regarding spoiling or screwing up our children...I think worrying about a long night of trying to get your baby to sleep is one of them. So, when, without much ado, Olivia falls asleep, it is like I have a miracle baby!
Of course, she woke up at around 1am for a feeding, which is against my hopes she's on her way to those 12 hour sleeps we all hear about...but I will "suffer" for now. One small step for mommy-kind.
I cashed in on my winning the personal training session (mentioned in a previous, pregnant blog) this past Friday. Kate showed me a full body workout routine that I can do while Olivia watches with delight. So, now I have no excuse. I have something I can do to tone the flab AND entertain my baby. The next hump to get over is that avoiding getting back into triathlon training.. I may have to chisel the dust off my bike..
Of course, she woke up at around 1am for a feeding, which is against my hopes she's on her way to those 12 hour sleeps we all hear about...but I will "suffer" for now. One small step for mommy-kind.
I cashed in on my winning the personal training session (mentioned in a previous, pregnant blog) this past Friday. Kate showed me a full body workout routine that I can do while Olivia watches with delight. So, now I have no excuse. I have something I can do to tone the flab AND entertain my baby. The next hump to get over is that avoiding getting back into triathlon training.. I may have to chisel the dust off my bike..
Thursday, June 4, 2009
HI HO, HI LOW, It's off to work I go
It's only Thursday, but, thankfully, my first work week is over. Again, that economy that is nothing but bad is good for me. My hours are reduced, so I get more time with my O.
The first day was the hardest, but I have to say I didn't cry as much as I thought I would. Basically, when I left the house, I cried, I cried on the way to work and then I cried when Karen asked me how I was doing. PS - I am so grateful for all of the support I received from friends and family the first day. It really helps to have people who have been there reassure me that everything was going to be okay. Although, the only reason, I think, why I didn't cry the WHOLE day was because I just got so completely and utterly tired. I didn't have the energy to be sad...I mostly felt numb.
I could not wait to get home and wrap my arms around my baby. As luck would have it, she wasn't there when I got home! I had to white knuckle it until John got home. I called my mom to complain ;-) Of course, as soon as he got home, I ran to get her out of the car seat and, SHE WAS ASLEEP ;-0 How dare she not have her arms outstretched! (oh yeah, she can't do that yet) Luckily, she woke up shortly after getting home...I think it was the fact that I was breathing on her and using my mental power to wake her up!
She receives reports from her daycare: when she was fed, when she was diapered, when she napped...general comments. Aside from the mundane, her reviews were raves. Smiled all day... I was so proud of her! I knew she'd make a great impression on her caregivers. I mean, how could they NOT be smitten!
The next day was grandma-pa daycare. I wasn't as sad on day two because I knew she would be loved all day. The only complaint I have is that Olivia smelled like grandpa's cologne when we picked her up. There is something disconcerting about a baby that smells like a grownup...especially a baby girl smelling like a man. But, if that's all I have to complain about, I can consider myself blessed (and I do!)
I had a meeting with a client that day. He was surprised to hear that I had just recently given birth because I "lost the weight quickly". Whether or not he meant it, and I feel like I have a lot of tightening and toning to do, he made my day. It's good to hear things other than "are you here for the prenatal class?"
Wednesday, Olivia was back at daycare at John's work. That day her reviews were not as happy as the first day. She apparently was crying more. Oh woe is me. I hope this is not a trend. I don't want my baby to be sad! I want her to be happy and make friends with the other babies, and not want for the attention she deserves.
That night, John, O, my mom and I went to a tapas restaurant because I had read they had live music. Okay, I was thinking Spanish guitar...that would be soothing for Olivia. Well, there was a guitar involved, but the guy was singing standards and not the exotic Spanish guitar ala Almodovar films that I was hoping for. Nonetheless, the restaurant was packed (I think that others shared my hopes for exotic music). I was worried that the noise level would upset Olivia and we would be up all night, but she just slept the whole time! I am so happy to know I can take her out to restaurants (for now) and am not a slave to my kitchen. The food was good, the sangria was great... Well, the only hitch in this great night was that Olivia was so tired she did not nurse a ton when we got home and woke up hungry at 2am. But, what's past is past.
That's another concern I have...mostly about myself. Olivia is starting to be able to sleep longer, but now she has gotten to making noises (mostly sucking her hands) at around midnight. I take this as my call to bring her in bed with me. It's probably not the correct thing to do, but it's a drug for me. Despite all of the warnings, I am getting dangerously close to that time where you CAN start spoiling your baby (especially when it comes to sleeping) and I don't know if I can give up holding her in my arms while I sleep. I love being able to hear and feel her breathing and knowing she's safe and snug. I may need an intervention, or I will have problems shortly with her not being able to sleep in her own bed.
Olivia is now a drooling fool. Google has given me several reasons for this...teething, developing saliva as an indication that she's ready for solids soon, sucking on hands...all things that are not to be concerned about. The only thing is I am not yet used to putting bibs on her all of the time and her clothes get soaked. It's really amazing how much liquid comes out of such a tiny baby!
Speaking of liquid..Olivia is still going number two ALL of the time. We went from every other day to every hour. I miss the time when I was concerned that she was constipated...
Below are the comments from John and the caregiver regarding O's first days at daycare:
06.01.09
JOHN: Olivia looks very happy and is watching the other kids. When I first got down there she looked at me then smiled. Generally they commented on how good she was and how much she smiled. Caregiver also commented on how fast she drank. Not 1st place but a close 2nd to another kid...
It was bit of a mad house at daycare this morning. Luckily, I got there just before the rush. Olivia was watching the other kids when I left. I'll go back down at lunch.
TEACHER COMMENTS: Great day! :-) Olivia has been in a happy and smiley mood. She had fun looking at the hanging toy by the mirror. She took her bottle good and went to sleep on her own in her crib :-) Giving us lots of smiles :-) She's a wonderful baby :-) (don't I know it!)
WONDERFUL FIRST DAY!
06.03.09
JOHN: I went down there for 20 or so minutes over lunch. She was having her the 2nd bottle... First was at 9:30! Hope she has a long afternoon nap...
Anyway, I got Olivia to burp and she was happy looking around at the other kid, all who had just made a very big mess with lunch. I put her on the mat and showed her pictures and put her hands on the hanging toys. I turned away to talk to the caregiver and when I looked back Olivia had grabbed on of the toys hanging by her... that's something new. She got a bit crabby so I picked her up and she was happily looking at the other kids.
TEACHER COMMENTS: A little bit sad today :-( She cried more today than yesterday, but was fine on the floor mat while playing with daddy :-) Smiling at times. Looking around and watching other children playing on the floor.
The first day was the hardest, but I have to say I didn't cry as much as I thought I would. Basically, when I left the house, I cried, I cried on the way to work and then I cried when Karen asked me how I was doing. PS - I am so grateful for all of the support I received from friends and family the first day. It really helps to have people who have been there reassure me that everything was going to be okay. Although, the only reason, I think, why I didn't cry the WHOLE day was because I just got so completely and utterly tired. I didn't have the energy to be sad...I mostly felt numb.
I could not wait to get home and wrap my arms around my baby. As luck would have it, she wasn't there when I got home! I had to white knuckle it until John got home. I called my mom to complain ;-) Of course, as soon as he got home, I ran to get her out of the car seat and, SHE WAS ASLEEP ;-0 How dare she not have her arms outstretched! (oh yeah, she can't do that yet) Luckily, she woke up shortly after getting home...I think it was the fact that I was breathing on her and using my mental power to wake her up!
She receives reports from her daycare: when she was fed, when she was diapered, when she napped...general comments. Aside from the mundane, her reviews were raves. Smiled all day... I was so proud of her! I knew she'd make a great impression on her caregivers. I mean, how could they NOT be smitten!
The next day was grandma-pa daycare. I wasn't as sad on day two because I knew she would be loved all day. The only complaint I have is that Olivia smelled like grandpa's cologne when we picked her up. There is something disconcerting about a baby that smells like a grownup...especially a baby girl smelling like a man. But, if that's all I have to complain about, I can consider myself blessed (and I do!)
I had a meeting with a client that day. He was surprised to hear that I had just recently given birth because I "lost the weight quickly". Whether or not he meant it, and I feel like I have a lot of tightening and toning to do, he made my day. It's good to hear things other than "are you here for the prenatal class?"
Wednesday, Olivia was back at daycare at John's work. That day her reviews were not as happy as the first day. She apparently was crying more. Oh woe is me. I hope this is not a trend. I don't want my baby to be sad! I want her to be happy and make friends with the other babies, and not want for the attention she deserves.
That night, John, O, my mom and I went to a tapas restaurant because I had read they had live music. Okay, I was thinking Spanish guitar...that would be soothing for Olivia. Well, there was a guitar involved, but the guy was singing standards and not the exotic Spanish guitar ala Almodovar films that I was hoping for. Nonetheless, the restaurant was packed (I think that others shared my hopes for exotic music). I was worried that the noise level would upset Olivia and we would be up all night, but she just slept the whole time! I am so happy to know I can take her out to restaurants (for now) and am not a slave to my kitchen. The food was good, the sangria was great... Well, the only hitch in this great night was that Olivia was so tired she did not nurse a ton when we got home and woke up hungry at 2am. But, what's past is past.
That's another concern I have...mostly about myself. Olivia is starting to be able to sleep longer, but now she has gotten to making noises (mostly sucking her hands) at around midnight. I take this as my call to bring her in bed with me. It's probably not the correct thing to do, but it's a drug for me. Despite all of the warnings, I am getting dangerously close to that time where you CAN start spoiling your baby (especially when it comes to sleeping) and I don't know if I can give up holding her in my arms while I sleep. I love being able to hear and feel her breathing and knowing she's safe and snug. I may need an intervention, or I will have problems shortly with her not being able to sleep in her own bed.
Olivia is now a drooling fool. Google has given me several reasons for this...teething, developing saliva as an indication that she's ready for solids soon, sucking on hands...all things that are not to be concerned about. The only thing is I am not yet used to putting bibs on her all of the time and her clothes get soaked. It's really amazing how much liquid comes out of such a tiny baby!
Speaking of liquid..Olivia is still going number two ALL of the time. We went from every other day to every hour. I miss the time when I was concerned that she was constipated...
Below are the comments from John and the caregiver regarding O's first days at daycare:
06.01.09
JOHN: Olivia looks very happy and is watching the other kids. When I first got down there she looked at me then smiled. Generally they commented on how good she was and how much she smiled. Caregiver also commented on how fast she drank. Not 1st place but a close 2nd to another kid...
It was bit of a mad house at daycare this morning. Luckily, I got there just before the rush. Olivia was watching the other kids when I left. I'll go back down at lunch.
TEACHER COMMENTS: Great day! :-) Olivia has been in a happy and smiley mood. She had fun looking at the hanging toy by the mirror. She took her bottle good and went to sleep on her own in her crib :-) Giving us lots of smiles :-) She's a wonderful baby :-) (don't I know it!)
WONDERFUL FIRST DAY!
06.03.09
JOHN: I went down there for 20 or so minutes over lunch. She was having her the 2nd bottle... First was at 9:30! Hope she has a long afternoon nap...
Anyway, I got Olivia to burp and she was happy looking around at the other kid, all who had just made a very big mess with lunch. I put her on the mat and showed her pictures and put her hands on the hanging toys. I turned away to talk to the caregiver and when I looked back Olivia had grabbed on of the toys hanging by her... that's something new. She got a bit crabby so I picked her up and she was happily looking at the other kids.
TEACHER COMMENTS: A little bit sad today :-( She cried more today than yesterday, but was fine on the floor mat while playing with daddy :-) Smiling at times. Looking around and watching other children playing on the floor.
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