Everything I needed to know, I learned from O

(random words of wisdom, in no particular order)
1. Sleep when your baby sleeps. Okay, that might be a LOT of sleep, but if you can, try the morning sleep schedule.
2. Some rules need breakin'
3. Some rules are there for a reason. If you follow them, you will be surprised at how they work in your favor.
4. Do not remove a loaded boob from a baby's mouth. (there will be spray-iage on her tiny face)
5. Change a loaded diaper or suffer the consequences.
6. If you lie a loaded baby on her back, there will be spit-up.
7. There is no relation to size and strength when it comes to baby farts. That is why they are handy to have...you can always blame the baby.
8. A baby will always surprise you... Things you never thought would make your day, like when she looks into your eyes, just make life worth living.
7. You actually don't move in your sleep when sleeping with a baby. (this is not a steadfast rule, but it worked for me) Sleeping with your baby is heaven. Heaven times infinity when you both get some zzzz's.
8. Nothing can top a baby smile. Nothing.
9. Babies can sleep through a lot. Loud noises, full diapers... What wakes them up? HUNGER. so keep them fed and sleep a little longer.
10. Compared to baby s%($, my s#*$ DON'T stink.
11. You can't spoil a baby for the first 3.5 months (depending on what pediatrician you have.) So love them, let them sleep with you, love them some more. They're not as difficult as everyone makes it out to be...or, it is, but you don't mind.
12. Having family close by is an immeasurable blessing. It allows you to go to the gym or just have a walking buddy or have a must-do romantic evening with your husband.
13. You learn to appreciate the simple pleasures in life and in your home...especially when it takes forever to get out the door.
14. Learn to multitask. If you can do something else while breastfeeding, it can be entertaining if not efficient. You feel like there is nothing you can't do.
15. It would be nice to have an extra hand if you have a baby. Yes, all mothers would look like freaks, but they would have brushed hair and teeth.
16. If you raised a baby solo, there really IS nothing you can't do.
17. That said, there is nothing like having someone to take the baby so you can go to the bathroom, pump, eat, brush your teeth, wash your face....
18. You really rethink what needs to get done during the day if you have three-hour-between feedings. Those mothers who have coiffed, highlighted hair and washboard abs have a staff or are figments of your imagination.
19. If you are breastfeeding, you will KNOW when your baby needs to eat next, if, for some freakish reason he or she hasn't informed you himself.
20. When your milk production goes up, you feel like you won the lottery.
21. Breastfeeding burns 500 calories. It helps lessen the guilt of not being able to make it to the gym.
22. The library is your friend. Learn it, live it, love it.
23. 12 weeks go by faster than you can ever imagine. Move to Europe or Canada before you give birth. they have 9 month to a year maternity leave.
24. Don't rely on your brain for much when you are sleep deprived. Keep a notepad handy for anything you think needs doing. Then, hand that notepad to your husband when he gets home. ;-)
25. Harry Potter is a curse and a blessing. The books are of Biblical lengths, but they will get you through maternity leave, have your baby hear your voice a LOT, and no repeats!
26. Start a blog. It's cathartic. Plus, when people tell you they've missed the updates if you take any kind of hiatus, it makes you feel important and loved ;-)
27. It's amazing how calm you find yourself under pressure. When there is a little helpless angel who needs you, you focus like a big focused thingy.
28. Don't have expectations about how your labor will go based on what happened to your friends or family. ESPECIALLY if her labor was "quick and easy". Plan for the worst and be pleasantly surprised. It's better than the other way around.
29. Zen is a baby holding your finger.
30. Did I mention that thing about the baby's smile? :-D
31. It is no longer about you. But, don't forget you. It doesn't help anyone if you do.
32. Make sure your friends and family know that you appreciate them and love them. (It's good to have someone affirm your belief that your baby is amazing and you are more than her servant.)
33. Don't think the worst of your husband if he can't read your mind. He will surprise and amaze you if you just ask for his help.
34. You will become a germ-nazi. Learn multiple, pleasant ways to ask people to wash their hands or not touch the baby.
35. Watch and learn from the pros. If you see other mothers interact with their babies in ways that you think are amazing, take note!
36. It is amazing the wealth of knowledge you gain in a short period of time about all things baby. It's like immersing yourself in a new language. When you need to know it, you learn it..FAST. This also means that mothers of older babies know tons more than you. So ask them if you have a question.
37. OR, if there is a question you have about all things baby, I can guarantee it has been asked and answered on the internet. Google is your friend.
38. Facebook is the fastest way to show everyone how adorable your baby is. (Of course, it can never compare to the real thing)
39. If you think you'll find the time during your maternity leave to learn a new language or improve your professional skills in some way or get back to your pre-baby weight, you are in for a rude awakening.
40. You will have a new appreciation and meaning for baby fat. Embrace the pooch. It will keep you calm and unaffected when people think you are still pregnant.
41. Make no sudden movements or loud noises when there is a baby attached to your breast.
42. Formula can save your life. Don't have any misgivings about it, but buy the ones in the premeasured packets if you know you can't go through an entire container in one month (that's how long it's good for as soon as you open it).
43. Baby seats and swings are lifesavers. You get your hands for five minutes up to an hour. Go forth and eat.
44. After nine months of not drinking, you are a cheap date and you appreciate every sip of wine or beer and Guinness is now something you drink because it helps your milk production.
45. Murphy and his damn law.
46. When a doctor tells you that things will get better after a certain period of time, they will. Learn patience.
47. Cutting a baby's finger nails is an extremely frightening task. If you accidentally draw blood, don't worry, you are not the first mother to do so and you are NOT a terrible mother, even though you will think you are from the way your baby is crying.
48. You may never look like that happy mother and baby in those baby sling commercials.
49. Have no judgements about epidurals. You don't know what pain is until your epidural wears off. You don't get a prize for suffering after your baby is born. We all get the same prize of a bundle of joy.
50. Make sure, if you work, it is in an environment that is supportive of having children. You will need as much time and flexibility as possible. Whatever you think you need, you need more.
51. If you aren't known for patience, your baby has a lesson or ten thousand for you.
52. Just when you think you are on top of things, it all changes.

Dear Olivia (A letter from a guilt ridden mommy)

It is Tuesday already. Soon I will have to leave you, for what will seem like an eternity for me. I promise I still love you and that I will make up for it when we see eachother again in the evenings.
I hope that you are loved by your caretakers. I know that grandma and grandpa can't help but give you love and kisses. I hope that you grow and learn in your new environment. Know that daddy is not far away and that I am always thinking about you! I think this will be harder for me than it is for you, right now. Right now you get more people who will adore you almost as much as I do. I cannot be selfish on that front...more people need to know what a wonderful baby you are. I am so lucky to have had you mostly to myself these past three months. I cannot believe what an amazing baby you have been. You are talking and smiling and holding your head up! I cannot wait to see how you continue to grow, my smart little angel.
I was worried that you would stop sleeping through the night, but you continue to make me so proud and happy. I get to be more rested to enjoy your amazing company. Even if I never sleep again, I will love and adore you! (Don't take that as a request)
You will be amongst other babies in your new environments. You will be able to make new friends and show the other babies how to be the most amazing baby in the universe!
Promise never to forget how much I love and adore you.

Love, Mommy

When it rains...

It rains men....men in leather S&M paraphernalia.
Now, for a baby blog, why do I begin with this? Well, in my wildest imagination, I could not make up what has happened recently.
John's parents, brother, niece and nephew are in town. They came in yesterday and are staying at a hotel near the Hilton Chicago. It just so happens that the Hilton Chicago is hosting the International Mr. Leather Convention. (IMRL to those in the know). If you go to their website, you will see images of the cast of characters that were on display smoking around all of the entrances to the Hilton Chicago. John's parents have not been to the US for probably a decade now and they came here obviously to see their new grandchild/niece/cousin and Chicago just so happens to welcome them with a multitude of Judas Priest frontman. All I can say is, thank GOODNESS that THEY booked the hotel.
Today was Olivia's Baptism. She is no longer subject to spending eternity in limbo. (Apparently an old wives tale and not actually in any religious doctrine.) Everything was great: family and friends...John's niece and nephew were even called upon to take part in the ceremony (which I am sure they secretly enjoyed). Of course, though, Olivia has had a reaction to one of her vaccines as of late, meaning she has diarrhea. Since she is too young to take any type of medication for this, we just have to let it run it's course. (unless she gets dehydration, fever or bloody stools..then it's hospital time...knock on wood) Anyway, I secretly feared throughout the whole ceremony that she would "let one go" so to speak center stage at the altar...with the lovely reverberations in the church. Luckily, my worries were for naught, but I have a whole slew of new concerns now: because everything is running through her (quite literally) she needs to eat more...more than I can produce. It is not even giving her formula or needing to stock up on diapers, wipes and butt paste....it's that the few precious evenings I had where she slept through the night are now a distant memory for the time being as she needs to eat more. Oh woe is me...a grand finale to the maternity leave, no? And here I thought it was just going to get better. No, Olivia must go out with a boom [in her pants].

All the things I am doing while NOT worshipping at the altar of O

It's amazing how things you used to do without a care in the world...eat breakfast, clean the kitchen, blow dry your hair, go to the bathroom...now become guilt ridden activities that detract from the precious few moments left with your baby before you return to work. I had and am having a huge side of guilt with my morning coffee (even though O is sleeping right now).
On the brighter side, I can see why maternity leave is three months. I am just starting to feel "normal" during the day. I think I can physically fool myself and others that I can do my job once I return.
On the less brighter side, Olivia slept 6 hours last night, which is technically baby sleep-through-the-night, but awaking at 3:45 am is not mommy sleep-through-the-night. I don't like this trend.
On the brighter brighter side, Olivia is talking more and more lately (in "goo" speak) and she is getting stronger in her neck and her legs. She can hold her head up like a pro and kick the SH#$ out of you if her legs are pointed in your direction. Oh, I am so proud!

Multi-tasking isn't just for offices anymore

A lot of us have tried to multitask to our own detriment. Not admitting to anything, I see on the news that they are outlawing texting while driving. People nowadays have to get everything done when they think about it, peril-osity be damned, and I am no exception (minus the texting and driving part...I have a baby to worry about!) But, I found today was the day of multi-tasking. I breastfed and ate breakfast at the same time, iced cookies and entertained Olivia (in the baby bjorn (a miracle invention)) and did other things that would really dip into the TMI category. I am trying to maximize my time with the love of my life because I am almost down to one week B.W. (before work). I am now blogging while O is napping, which I consider multi-tasking too because I am constantly praying she doesn't wake while I am blogging (aka not paying attention to her).
I am trying to decide whether or not getting up at 4:30 this morning is staying with the sleeping through the night trend or trending in the wrong direction... I hope she keeps pushing through into the 5am category, because, even though it's only a half an hour in time time, it's stupid-o'clock in my time. I think that if she wakes up at 5am, I can handle going to work after her morning feed. If she wakes up in the 4am area, I will have to go back to sleep and then I am sure that won't get me through the day.
Well, I hear my precious beckon, time to focus my attention on her (and try to negate the extreme feelings of guilt I have about my pending returning to work).

Oh, Happy Day!

Olivia was put to bed at around 10pm last night and John's alarm went off this morning at 5am (for his morning run, mr-overachieving-man). I have never been so happy to wake up at 5am as I was this morning! Olivia had slept through the night! The joy that is in my heart cannot be expressed in words and the accumulation of milk that was in my rock-solid boobs had to be expressed ASAP!
It's amazing how she has developed over these past few days. I guess there were signs that this was all to happen shortly: She started talking ("agoo", for the most part) up a storm yesterday. Plus, I am filling one 5-oz bottle now with the boob juice, and that got me 5 hours between feedings the night before last, but LAST night...oh LAST NIGHT....!
What to Expect the First Year has a list in the beginning of each chapter (by month) and it lists all of the things that "may" occur during each month of life and Olivia is meeting most of her targets! I am so amazed at how they develop, without training, right on schedule. I am still trying to get her to turn her head at the sound of my voice, but that is not yet to be. Hey, as far as I care, she can take a break...sleeping through the night ranks on the top of MY list ;-)
Now I have to go adore my little sleep champion!

Just remember, I love you

Oy. Two month immunization shots today at the pediatricians. I was not looking forward to this one. It just so happened I had a full bottle of pumped breast milk for her to enjoy before and after the shots...seemed to be the trick to take her mind off the pain. Man, did she scream bloody murder when she was getting the shots, though. It broke my heart. It's interesting though, how, for the first shot, her eyes just went wide, like she was thinking about what to do...and then the mouth opened wide and the screams kept a comin'. But, as soon as the shots were over (three in total), I stuck a bottle in her mouth and all was right with the world again. She's even sleeping right now! I hope this doesn't make her crabby for the rest of the day and the worst is over.
Just before the shots, I held her little hands and said..."Remember, I love you." It's really heartbreaking knowing they are about to be in pain ;-(
On the brighter side of life, we just got back from a weekend in Galena. (John was doing the duathlon there). Aside from the wind, the weather was gorgeous. We spent Sunday walking along Main St., which is the definition of quaint. Who knew Illinois was so beautiful with historic streets, rolling hills and wineries! Anyway, the pies du resistance (sp?) was stopping by my old watercolor teacher (two blissful weeks in the Greek Isles learning watercolor from a master) Carl Johnson's gallery. www.cjart.net. His wife and son were there and we ended up spending a couple of hours at his gallery just talking. His wife is quite loquacious. I forgot how much I loved them together. We were there so long, Olivia was due for a feeding and I ended up breastfeeding her in Carl's apartment above the gallery. Talk about surreal: staring at all of those paintings of places you've been in Carl's unique style of watercolor while nursing. It's like I have come full circle. Unfortunately, Carl is retired from teaching the watercolor class, and he's in his 70's so, even if Olivia follows in my footsteps, she will miss out on the Johnson's.
Next week, the in-laws are coming to see their grandchild/niece/cousin all the way from England. I am under pressure to impress. I know Olivia will cover about 90% of that, but I still need to think about things to do.
Also, next Sunday is O's Baptism. I scheduled it so the in-laws could be there...I am glad it worked out. I am excited to dress my little beautiful up in her frilly white gown Grandma got for her. Although, I have to say, the bald head makes her look like a boy in a dress. There is not much we can do until that hair grows in ;-). My cute little bald meringue...

Sunshine and Clouds

Shhhh. I have to be quick about this. O is sleeping and it's past her feeding time. I found that it's best to let her get her z's so I am pressing my luck in the hopes that I can have some blog time.
Unfortunately, I was on vacation sans internet so I couldn't remark upon her development and our experience. I am trying to recollect any shining moments, all I can think about now is the 18 hour drive to and fro. 2 month olds are remarkably easy travel companions, so I would recommend it to any woman who is not breastfeeding. I actually pumped in the car during the ride. If there is anything that makes you feel like a cow, it would be staring out a car window while breast pumps are attached to you. It's funny now that I can look back on it, but otherwise, tragic.
Olivia is smiling more and holding up her head when on her tummy...right on schedule. I say schedule like "shedule" because I am married to a Brit, I can get away with such things and it sounds cooler. While this melts my heart to no end, the good comes with the inexplicable crabbiness. My bag of tricks no longer assuages my little angel. Sometimes you just need to let her cry it out until she sleeps...which is usually what she needs. I will never understand the crying because your tired. Skip the middle man, I say. Too bad I can't communicate that to her just yet.
I just picked up our cat today. Apparently she got loads of attention from her caregiver, while we were gone, because she has never been such an attention whore. So much fun to have a cat crying for attention while your baby is. Talk about guilt. Of course I am going to pick the baby over the cat, but it doesn't mean that I don't want to have two of me to spread the love. I just don't know how people have two children. It's one thing to ignore a cat....
T minus two weeks to return to work. Of course, Olivia is growing cuter by the day and it is just so amazing to watch her develop. It makes me sad to know that I will have to share her with others. On the brighter side, she is getting socialization and building up her immunities. And I will keep telling myself that until I believe it.